Teran asks: I recently got a new laptop and was curious if there is a dependable free or cheap virus protection out there in WWW wonderland? Moiré’s answer: Teran, an actual technology question! I’m so honored you chose to send me a question with such impeccable merit. Too often I get overlooked for such advice. People prefer to pick my brain for opinions on raising children, romantic relationships, and world religion. It’s nice to be trusted with such a valuable issue as […]
This week’s question: Judy asks, “Moire, do you go to the county fair?” Moire’s answer: Judy! So thankful for such a question this week. Early on in the week I had asked our semi-evil COO, Justin, if I could venture out to the annual county fair. His response (in usual tight-wad, fun-hater style) was, “No, it might mess up that new hairdo you have!” Needless to say, I was highly upset by this as I so enjoy visting the county fair and all it […]
This week’s question:Dane writes: “Moire, what’s up with the American flag? I know what the 50 stars are, but what about the stripes and stuff?” Moire’s answer: And what a timely question you’re asking Dane! The flag of the United States of America (or OLD GLORY, as I like to call it) is one of the most widely recognized symbols to represent this fine country we live in. As you pointed out, it has 50 stars, which represent the 50 states. What […]
This week’s question: Jared asks, “Moire, do you have to pay taxes? My mom and dad pay taxes and, as much as they complain, it must not be fun!” Moire’s answer: Jared, the wonderful thing about being a kitty cat is that the government has yet to figure out how to charge me a single cent of tax! I must say that I wouldn’t be surprised if they somehow did figure out a way to put the SQUEEZE on my tail! But, […]
A letter from COO, Justin H….. Hello fans of Moire (A CAT)! I wanted to let you know that I appreciate all the nice, sometimes threatening, emails I received over the weekend and earlier this week regarding the proper care of Moire during the summer. After some confusion I realized he included my email address in his last column. (The column where he was whining about my ‘budget awareness’ when it comes to his cosmetic needs.) I do understand that […]
This week’s question: Tina asks “Moire, with all that long hair do you get hot this time of year?” Moire’s answer: Tina, you’ve asked a question with precise timing. This week I’ve been miserable. Good grief it is hot under these layers. I know, some people will tell you that cats have long hair as it insulates them. Insulates me from what? A nuclear explosion?! That’s rubbish in my opinion. I’m one hot kitty. Add the humidity on top of that and […]
This week’s question: Macy asks “Moire, have you ever gotten tired of living at MPA?” Moire’s answer: Macy, thank you for emailing me this question. I deeply appreciate your thoughtfulness. As you know from previous writings I do get cranky at times when dealing with various MPA team members (especially that ridiculous COO, Justin). And sometimes I become relentlessly bored on the weekend when no one is working. Still, if I reflect carefully, I am reminded of the humble beginnings from which […]
This week’s question: Sheryl asks, “Moire, most people don’t like all this rain we’ve been getting. What do you think about it?” Moire’s answer: My dearest Sheryl, I don’t like the rain. As the songstress once crooned “Rainy days and Mondays always get me down…” I suppose if I were a duck or a brooding songwriter type I might love it. However, as it is, the rain makes me quite upset. I can’t venture out-of-doors. Rain water does terrible things to my […]
This week’s question: Maria asks “Are you a morning kitty or anevening kitty?” Moire’s answer: Maria, thanks for the question! I am, indeed, a morningkitty. While I enjoy all times of day I find the morning brings renewed energy, hope, and vitality. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy my beauty rest as much as the next proper puss. One morning I was stirred from my peaceful slumber by a most annoying nibbling sound. With one eye open I surveyed my territory to identify the source and there, […]
This week’s question: Rebel, a Brittney spaniel from Ottuwma, asks: “During a recent thunderstorm I was very scared. So scared, in fact, that my owner let me out of my kennel to sleep on a blanket in her room. Can you give me advice on how to not be afraid of the storms and how to get my sleeping arrangements permanently upgraded?” Moire’s answer: Rebel, you certainly raise an important concern that many of your ancestors before you have dwelt upon! My […]