Ask Moire

I am speechless.

May 15, 2014

“Has the cat got your tongue?!” Recently I heard a customer in our office use this phrase when speaking to their child and it got me wondering… do I have someone’s tongue? I certainly hope not. I immediately went to my iPad and searched GOOGLE.com to find answers! To my surprise, and horror, I found some disturbing information. For, you see, many etymologists (those that study words and the history of them), attribute this phrase to the frightening maritime torture device, the ‘cat-o-nine-tails‘, and not the modern feline at all. It is said that after a good whipping with this grisly instrument of torture the victim would be rendered speechless. I can imagine so!

So, you see, the ‘cat’ in this case is not your lovable feline… just as I suspected. I would never take anyone’s tongue, nor would I have use for one! I would rather you pet me – with your hand!

Until next time, my faithful readers, remember that things aren’t always as they appear, and GOOGLE has all the answers!

Fondest Regards,


MOIRE

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Have a question for Moiré? Send it directly to the feisty feline at moire@askmpa.com. He’s (im)patiently waiting… (Please note: MPA is not responsible for Moiré’s answers as he sometimes has a bit of a bad attitude.)

Moire The Cat

I am a cat. A cat that has done more, seen more, and been more than most men will ever know. My pedigree is defined by modest lineage but I have risen to be one of the finest. One of the most humble, modest, handsome, intelligent, regal, charming, and cunning felines you may ever meet. I often have 'run-ins' with the MPA tight-wad, fun-hater COO, Justin over such things as spa visits and luxury grooming. Having a cat with the skills I possess is not in-expensive. I don't come with a manual and there is no 'figuring me out'. I write a weekly column called "ASK MOIRE" where my faithful readership gets advice and suggestions for a healthy, more balanced life by sending questions to this email address: MOIRE@ASKMPA.COM

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